Women and Divorce Recovery: You Still Have Super Powers.
Life as you knew it is over.
You may have contemplated getting out for a long time. Maybe you have “worked” on the relationship in marriage counseling or maybe someone came home one day and said, “I’m done”. No matter what led to the end of your marriage, the aftermath is still difficult.
Yes, I’ve cried in storage units.
Divorce fallout highlights changing social relationships, loss of communities, emotional grief, moving homes, identity shifts, and the balance in your bank account. In fact, the poverty rate for separated women is 27 percent, nearly triple the figure for separated men according to an article in The Atlantic Magazine.
You still have Super Powers...Even More After a Divorce
Guess what? You do still have super powers. Your secret sauce is still flowing. As a therapist who specializes in divorce recovery, I can tell you that it does get better. A therapist may help you realize, past all the financial and emotional strain, you have an opportunity to be more, the maximum you, better than ever. . .
The best advice for women from respected divorce counselors and divorce recovery therapists:
1) Forgive yourself. Be scared. Feel great loss. It doesn’t matter if the ending was full of conflict or went smoothly.
2) You don’t have to figure it all out immediately. Initially, just cover the life needs you have in the moment. Waiting a bit before making a big decision often turns out to be a great idea.
3) Make a list of the lingering questions you have to know the answer to. Begin to ask around to assemble a team of people who have those answers.
4) Feel the fear. Its ok to feel shame. Did I mention this one already?
5) Reach out to your people. Call or email again. Connect with friends. Seek out different communities. You know who they are.
6) Tune into your body. What is it telling you?
7) Continue to reframe your story. Keep saying this is a process, an opportunity. Commit to being happy, not right. Commit to doing, not perfection.
Specifically, divorce recovery counseling offers the opportunity to create the life you desire. Divorce counseling enables individuals to avoid common pitfalls after divorce.
What does Post-divorce therapy address?
1) Having a non-judgemental space for reflection and growth that allows for all the joy and pain.
2) Getting past the notion that you can change your ex-partner. Its not your job to change them.
3) Understanding on a deeper level how you function in intimate relationships. Learning about your personal attachment style as a way to ensure healthier future relationships.
4) If you are a parent, counseling allows you to address emotional healing for you and your kids. You will look back and know you did the best you could to move on in a way that supports child development.
5) Work on any bad coping strategies that may pop up. Sometimes these lead to more problems.
6) Accepting a new reality that allows for mistakes. Tapping into courage you didn’t know you had.
You are worth the investment in your divorce recovery.
This is your life, and it’s important.
Begin counseling for divorce recovery today.
Healing from divorce is complicated, and therapy can help you navigate the emotions and changes that come with this change in your life. You can live a full life after divorce. You deserve support and I am here to help. If you are ready to invest in yourself and begin counseling:
Fill out this form to schedule a free phone consultation,
Begin counseling and journey towards healing.
Other Services offered at my Durham NC office and via teletherapy:
I am a licensed therapist in Raleigh/Durham area. In addition to divorce and co-parenting counseling, I offer a wide variety of other mental health services. These services include treatment for anxiety, counseling for depression, counseling for difficult life transitions, premarital counseling, and therapy for other types of relationships. Contact my office to learn more today.